There is without a doubt no other act of deception that is more emotionally devastating than the various forms of sweetheart swindles. I won't attempt to covey the hurt or long-term damage left in the wake of such crimes, because I do not want to further insult the victims who themselves find it difficult or impossible to aptly describe the utter frustration and sense of loss that accompany these scams. At best, I can only tell you how the scams operate, who commits them, and why law enforcement tends to ignore such offenses.

THE PLAYERS Although both males and females operate this scam, most cases involve male suspects who target females. Contrary to popular belief, the suspect's looks have little or noting to do with their effectiveness. Much like any other scam artists, it's their ability to tell a believable lie that determines their success. Each of the many sweetheart con artists I have interviewed throughout my career possess the attributes of a psychopath. I'll spare you from a dissertation, here, on all the details that go into the making of such swallow people, and shall instead draw upon the most apt description available. In his book, Without Conscious, Dr. Robert D. Hare described psychopaths as "[s]ocial predators, who charm, manipulate, and ruthlessly plow their way through life, leaving a broad trail of broken hearts, shattered expectations, and empty wallets. Completely lacking in a conscience and in feelings for others. They selfishly take what they want and do as they please, violating social norms and expectations without the slightest sense of guilt or regret." If there exists a more apt description of these social predators I have yet to come across it.

THE VICTIMS Except for infants, and children, there does not exist any one age group who has escaped falling prey to this scam. The most current, and by far the most disgusting, trend involves organized groups of sweetheart swindlers who target the elderly. Not satisfied with merely taking them for everything they have, these lowlifes actually murder their victims by using various medications, or by starving them to death. What's more, they usually get away with such atrocities. Should you doubt this, then please read the book by Jack Olsen, (Hastened To The Grave) which I have listed on this web site. The criminal Gypsy groups involved in such evil acts are growing in numbers and will not be stopped any time soon. Victims, regardless of age, are often selected as potential prey because they are lonely, recently widowed, depressed, or otherwise in need of positive interaction with another human. As the cons see it, "get-em when they're down." If you have never placed your trust in anyone, then you are indeed one of a kind. For the rest of us, trusting others comes natural and is very much a necessary part of our existence. We have neither the time nor the inclination to verify everything we hear, or run background checks on every person we meet. Knowing this should make it easier to understand how someone might place their faith in a con artist who says and does all the right things while professing their love.

THE SCAMS How the potential victims are first approached varies and depends on the con artist's choice of roles. Some prefer to locate their prey in bars, churches, or at social gatherings. Others rely on chance meetings. Common among all such players is their ability to quickly size up their intended prey. Although most of us aren't aware of the vast amounts of information we give to others, you can be sure that the con artists absorb every tidbit and have honed their ability to see what others overlook. How we dress, our choice of hairstyles, the type of car we drive, what part of town we live, and a host of other clues are given away without us ever uttering a word. After a con artist gets his intended prey to start talking, the game begins. They will do and say whatever they believe the victim wants to see and hear. They will, of course, only do so if the intended mark has sufficient cash of other property. In other words, poor people don't make good victims. After gaining sufficient amounts of respect and trust from the intended prey, promises are made but seldom kept, and tales suitable for Hollywood are spun for the sole purpose of extracting more money and property. These scams unravel in direct proportion to the victim's remaining cash. Once the funds are depleted, and suspicions are aroused, the promises of eternal love, and marriage join the con artist in a quick departure.

PUBLIC ATTITUDE We have developed an annoying habit in this country wherein we view all who fall prey to con artists as fools who should have known better. We, of course, don't publicly use such descriptions, yet we remain unshaken in our belief that such is the case---each and every time. We have no sympathy for fraud victims not because we are insensitive or otherwise cruel people, rather because we just don't know how the game is played. That this lack of understanding and public apathy is carried over into our law enforcement agencies should come as no real surprise. Most cops would rather investigate a triple ax murder than to get involved in a sweetheart scam investigation. Many state's prosecutors share in this belief and frequently escape having to handle the case by saying "it's a civil matter." Too many victims have heard those words, and now feel they have twice been betrayed; once by the con artist, and then by the people who are supposed to protect them from such harm.

COPOUT These cases are hard to prove because of a dirty word called CONSENT. More specifically, if one enters into what seems to be a consensual relationship with another person, and then proceeds to turn over money and property to that person, then there is no crime. Or so the story goes. Should the victim be able to prove they were intentional deceived by the con artist, then perhaps a case could be made. Herein enters another dirty word, INTENT. Proving one's intent is anything but easy. This is especially true if that person happens to be a psychopathic con artist. Most, assuming they are ever caught, rely on well-rehearsed rationalizations that have worked for them in the past and continue to fool all who listen.

Here's where I get into trouble with my fellow officers and those underpaid, overworked, and unappreciated prosecutors. I really believe that a hell of a lot more can and should be done to put these con artists away. That a case might be difficult to prove does not mean it's impossible to prove. The vicious circle here involves police who are frequently ill equipped to handle such cases because the suspect has fled their jurisdiction, or the officers never received any training on how to investigate such con games. This lack of knowledge makes it impossible for a prosecutor to seriously proceed with a case because there just isn't any evidence. Having investigated many of these cases myself, I am keenly aware of the aggravation, frustration, and problems encountered. Then, too, I also know that these con artists can be beaten at their own game once you know how the game is played.

If you still think there is no real harm in all this, or that sweetheart scams aren't real crimes, then please provide me with your home address. I shall give it to some of the burglars I know so they can help themselves to your worldly goods. Sounds silly, I know, but I can assure you that should this happen, you would feel violated and upset that someone invaded the privacy of your home. Yet what's the real harm? There are no physical injuries, no face-to-face contact, and your missing property is probably covered by your home insurance. Then, too, why should a burglar who takes a pocket watch from your home have to face a ten year prison term, while a sweetheart swindler who intentionally deceives a person, taking everything they have, not be considered a real criminal? At the rate we're going in our society, the day will arrive when we won't view anything as a crime unless, of course, it involves us personally.

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